The Robson Ranch Cigar Meetup is slightly toasted, mildly hydrated, always smoking.
Listen up, ghouls and gentle-smokers:
July gave us fireworks and grilled meat. August tried to bake us into people-jerky. Now it’s October, the month when skeletons come out of closets, pumpkins get weaponized, and we all pretend misters are a fog machine from a 1980s horror flick. So naturally, we’re meeting outside to light things on fire. Because nothing says “excellent life choices” like puffing a cigar in desert heat while a plastic bat judges your draw.
October Cigar Meetup Details (enter … if you dare)
Date: Wednesday, Oct. 29
Time: 6:30 p.m. (the witching hour for people with day jobs)
Location: Top secret. Think Area 51, but with better chairs, more cigars, and fewer autopsies.
Join the C-List to unlock the drop zone: cigarmeetup.us
What to Expect from the Other Side
* Cigars: Obviously. If it starts levitating, that’s “terroir,” not poltergeist.
* Misters: Working harder than your A/C in July; also our special-effects “graveyard fog.”
* Friends: Warm, witty, and faintly damp.
* Music: Mike-approved volume (translation: the undead will file a noise complaint).
* Shenanigans: Almost guaranteed; exorcisms optional.
Costume? Optional … but Ridiculously Encouraged
Capes are cool, but capes + torch lighters = flambéed Dracula. Witches, vampires, and “Guy Who Swears He Only Brought One Cigar” are all welcome. Bonus points if you outdress AJ, he’s moonlighting as our unofficial costume judge and can be bribed with maduros. Pumpkin-spice cigars permitted only if you can say “unironically” three times into a mirror without summoning judgment.
PRIZE DRAWING!
Toss a few bucks in the cauldron and brace yourself. You might stagger away with premium cigar loot, or a suspiciously “vintage” gadget of mysterious origin, expertly labeled with a slightly crooked sticker. Either way, you’ll leave feeling like a champion … assuming it doesn’t start whispering in Latin.
“Yes, It’s Hot.”—A Seasonal Horror Story
We live in a giant solar oven. But the misting system will be cranked high enough to hydrate a camel, a ghost, and that neighbor who only materializes when the raffle starts. Cold drinks and bad jokes will be within arm’s reach, like a trusty garlic necklace, but for thirst.
Whether you’re a cigar pro or still learning which end to light, you belong here. This isn’t just a meetup, it’s a rebellion against boredom, routine, and doing anything productive after 6 p.m.
Bring a cigar, bring a friend, and bring that “I ain’t afraid of no ghost—or 110°” attitude.
See you there—unless your lighter runs out of butane. In that case, we’ll hold a solemn, three-puff vigil.
—Mike & David, Robson Ranch Cigar Meetup Coordinators, Full-Time Misting Enthusiasts, Part-Time Ghost Wranglers
Extremely Official, Totally Serious Halloween Safety Disclaimer: No capes near open flames. No summoning circles made of ash. Misters are not holy water. BYOB = Bring Your Own Beverage (and broom, if applicable). If your cigar whispers in Latin, it’s probably just the wind, or David practicing for the raffle.